Grateful

I confess I had some complaints about this week.  It seemed to drag into eternity, particularly felt onThursday night at about 7:42 p.m., which is the point at which I usually cannot go on.  Some nights are worse than others (I am 100 percent not a night person).

But one must rally at 7:42 p.m. when bed time for the kids is approaching.  One must make sure that the homework is done, it is packed in the backpack, the backpack is on the peg, the piano has been practiced, the calendar has been consulted, the clothes and materials for the next day are ready, the screens are off (HORRORS!), the teeth are brushed, the pajamas are on, the chapter has been read, the back is rubbed, the song is sung, the nightime negotiations are complete, and then there is silence. That is usually IT for me. I put on the reading glasses, open the book, read about three sentences, then fall asleep.  Last night I added Pandora "Ambient" to the routine and I think I was out after one sentence of reading. 

So it has felt like a week of endless tasks at home and at work, checking one off creates five more, the sisyphus complex commences. 

But really, I just have to shut it.  At this very moment, I have three people very close to me who are dealing with significant health issues.  One is just two years old and in pediatric intensive care at Mayo after heart surgery.  How dare I complain at all? 

Last week I got to run 10 miles.  I had a body that carried me that far, was sore for a couple of days, but now is completely recovered.  I got to run it with my sister.  We probably loved the run as much because we could spend time together as the fact that we were running and feeling good.
 
I have a job that is steady for the moment, but even if I lost it, I have a spouse who has a job too. 

I have two magnificent children who I love even though I give them guff for being really loud all the time.  They're kids.  They should be loud. 

I have a wonderful partner who shares life and love and is a wonderful dad.  And a good friend, neighbor, and hard worker. 

This week I went to a conference with a keynote speaker who said that only 2 percent of the people in the world have both a college diploma and a job.  Doesn't matter where the diploma is from or what the job is.  2%.  How lucky am I?

I might be tired. I might have crick in my neck from weird sleeping with the window open.  But I have my health, my home, a job, and my friends and family.  Such basic things, but such a privilege and gift at the same time.

White light tonight.  To Ella, Erika, Ruthann and a lot of other people in my world I know are struggling physically, emotionally or spiritually.

May I remember and may I be grateful.  

Happy Birthday to Me!

One of the gifts I want to give myself on this, my 41st b-day, is more blogging without worry.  Pep wrote her blog a letter the other day apologizing for not writing, and then Amy shared a great new blog with me which in essence celebrated "the blog," so it has all inspired me to get back with it. I had a fun quick exchange with another blog hero of mine, Bindu Wiles, and that was another special treat on my special day.  Also, further inspiring me to get writing!

Of course, there is my part-time lover, Facebook -- but really it serves a different purpose. Like, helping create a Facebook Festival of sorts when it's your b-day!  Wow was that fun -- over 60 little "Happy B-Day!" zips zinging at me all day long.  I loved it (as evidenced by the photo placed on my page). 

Let me indulge me (and bore you) with some of my b-day favorite memories:

-For sure, I think in 2nd grade, when I went to Tama Fox's birthday party the week before mine, and thought there was no way I would ever get as many cool gifts as she got.  Especially clear to me:  she got a Mrs. Potato Head.  I wanted one so badly.  Then a week later I got one!  That was great!

-In 3rd grade, we got our underground pool, and for sure that puppy should have been closed down weeks earlier, but Mom and Dad kept it open so I could have a pool party.  And I did!  And the summer lifeguard, Sandy Goede came and brought me a huge chocolate chip cookie cake like thing and I almost fainted with joy.

-15 - Mom Faulkner made me a cake with coca-cola in it!!

-Sweet 16 -- Mom took me and 16 pals out to lunch at Bobbi's in the Park in White Bear Lake.  We all got dressed up and she also made sure cake from Cafe Latte was there.  Thank you mama! 

-18 -- Mom brought up Mom Faulkner, Mom Kolb and herself to St. Ben's for the day.  I don't remember what we did, but I was really homesick already and I had only been at college about six weeks.  That was wonderful!  At some point I'll find the picture from that day and add it.

-21 -- All of my roommates and college friends threw a surprise party for me, even though I figured it out early through conniving and scheming to get Mike B to blurt it out.  I do not remember a lot of that night, but I do remember bowls. 

-22 or 3 or 4?  -- Erika, Bobbi and Lisa came out to 88 for dinner (Tunafish Hotdish and Green Beans).  My dad made a comment about Madonna and we all laughed so hard we cried. 

-28ish? Oh something like that.  Matty gave me a bunch of red roses cuz we were so in love.  Sigh!  We were such awesome daters!

-30 - my golden birthday and collecting about 55 dictionaries for the Women's Prison Book Project.  And then Scrabble Jim simultaneously playing three games of Scrabble and winning them all.  (The theme of my b-day party was "literacy.")

-35 - 6?  Andy was just 2 -- Matt took the day off from work, hired cleaners, had his sister Jane come over and hang art, had worked with our neighbor to hide a new couch in his garage, made a huge dinner for us and neighbors.  I couldn't believe the house when I got home -- and it was so fun!  Thank you Matty!  I love you!

-40, last year.  Spent most of the day with my Mom, all documented on Facebook.  Then traveled to Lake Pepin for a picnic and hike with my familio.  And little Finn our dog. 

(Note:  Mom is such a key player in so many of these celebrations.  I hope I am passing that tradition on to my kiddos as well.)

Can't stop thinking about this -- what a lucky and full life I have. 

Thank you God, really. 

Thank you. 

Even in the hard times, thank you.

Because it needs to be recorded! Remembering Summer...

"There shall be an eternal summer in the grateful heart..."  Celia Thaxter

I have mentioned this so many times that it’s hard to believe that I haven’t shared it here, but I am still amazed at how summer HALTED and the school year began with a vengeance, all on September 7, 2010.  And not only school, but everything else.  Work escalated, social calendar filled, piano, soccer, scouting all began – good lord. 

I realized I never had time to document our summer, which, to me was one of the best summers we have ever had.  Or maybe it was just the best summer I ever had.  (Hmm.  Between Junior and Senior years of college was also pretty outstanding).  (And the summer Matt and I dated).  But anyhow…

So, this is mostly for my own historical purposes and the sake of capturing-- but if you want to read on, read on!  (sung to the tune of Cat's "well, if you want to sing out, sing out...")

It started two days after school ended.  We headed north and dropped Alice and her friend Bergen off at YMCA Camp Warren for a week.  Then the rest of us (me, Matt, Andy and Finn the dog) headed to the cabin for the week.

But wait -- I guess it REALLY started for me after the legislative session ended, so near middle May.  Session is a time of massive anxiety for me, much of it of my own creation.  Once it’s over the fog lifts.  No more than two days after it’s over, every chamber, room, hallway, etc. is cleaned thoroughly and polished. Everything is put away.  Quiet ensues. Interim begins.  My happiness level soars and I am immediately way more productive.  (I know, it’s ironic, session is what working at the legislature is all about, so what's my problem???). 

Alice loved camp!  There are a bunch of pics on my facebook page, here is one of my favorites – she’s the the on in green in front with the hat on: 

  

She really loved archery.  When we capped off the summer at the Fair, she participated in an archery demo and the demo guy told her she should join the WBL Archery Team.  I just love that.  She loves chess, archery, fencing, piano, and reading.  I love it!!!

Our week in June was so delightful.  Such a treat to spend time with just Andy and see all sorts of things about him that I miss because I too often glop them into “the kids.”  Andy is thoughtful, active, engineering oriented, loves fishing, and is 100% happy at the cabin.  He would move us there if he could. 

Upon return from vacation #1, we had a couple of weeks of “normal,” where we played t-ball with the crew, kids did the summer program, and I worked and worked, preparing for a work trip to DC and some pre-trip events on aging women in Minnesota. 

4^th of July arrived, and it was back up to the cabin for a cousin extravaganza.  Boat rides, beach time,  4^th of July parade, running races, wood chip dive and RAIN.   There was a lot of rain, and I was so glad we weren’t in tents.  Thank you lord Jesus. 

Post 4^th all gears shifted to prepare for our big extravaganza camping/road trip to Washington DC.  A two week trek was planned, state parks in Wisconsin, Indiana, Ohio, and West Virginia were identified. 

Quick before we left, we had a fun neighbor night with our fabulous neighbor group on Hague Avenue. 

Really quick right before we left, I reunited with my CSB/SJU pals when Brooke was in town. 

We left and that trip will have a post all unto its own one day.  But here are several one sentence summaries:

-we had awesome campsites and no rain

-we had awesome visits with Molly Schultz & fam in Chicago and Monica Fitzgerald (Pep) and fam in DC

-we are an awesome camping family.  We are really good at it and we are all very happy doing it. 

-we will never again go to DC in the summer unless we have to.  We died.  105 heat index does not work for us. 

-What was the best part of DC for the kids?  The hotel pool. (Seeing Pep, Su Danny and Benji was right up there as well.) 

-We are an awesome camping family.  Did I say that already?  However, I would imagine our awesomeness would be tested if there was bad weather.  Mama bear might not like that. 

After DC, we came home and wrapped up summer activities.  The kids had a superb summer program including field trips to museums, water parks, orchards, weekly swim & tennis lessons…I love how it’s all wrapped up into one spot, and all we have to do is drop off and pick up. Hallelujah!  And, because of all of our other fun stuff, they were only in for two weeks at a time, which was just the right ratio for them.

Summer concluded with a final cabin trip, this time with family.  We started with Matt’s family – his parents, John and Emily – his sister Jane and family (Joe, Johnny and Pete), and us.  We had great fun showing them the land and the lake, and it was interesting to suddenly be thrown into the role of tour guide.  We are so so used to having my parents or my Uncle around to answer all the questions, we realized how little we really know about Rainy.  Gotta get on that. 

The Brenengen’s exited and we had a three day interval before the Kramer’s arrived.  You wouldn’t think it was lucky, but it rained, allowing us to take some major steps on the attic renovation and clean up – including finishing sanding, some mudding/taping, priming and painting two shades of blue.  Mom and Dad came up a day early and overtook parenting so Matt and I could finish.  Then, all arrived.  We had another amazing weekend, and then we left to prepare for school starting. 

Our finale was a day at the Minnesota State Fair on Labor Day.  Our traditional chocolate malts, some junk food, the giant slide, the Eco Experience, the fine arts building, and jumping on the trampoline completed our adventure. 

If you’ve read this far – thank you for reading this litany.  I know not very many folks are reading this blog, and though I have the best designs and hopes to increase my entries, they seem to dissipate.

I am not sure the exact answer to the question of why summer of 2010 was so great.  Probably for me it was a reprieve from worries at work, a lot of time with Matt and the kids, a cross country road trip – I’ve always wanted to do that.  Feeling like the kids got to do a lot of great stuff, with us and without us…feeling like I could just keep up for a small amount of time.  I’m glad to have a job that allows unpaid time off, so we can have the extended trips - -and glad Matt is a solo practitioner and his work can pretty easily be done from anywhere

I think I also realize that this is a golden window of our family right now – the kids are young enough to love being with us, they are independent enough to allow me and Matt to do our own things when needed, there are several things we all really love doing together, and we have people who love us all over the place.  . What could be better than that?  That just seemed to come to a head this summer. 

Hope you all had wonderful summers as well.

Friday Fun

Pre-departure party with my Bennies!

Getting Ready to Roll!

T-one week and counting to road trip mania. The odd post below is my practice post with a blog-app for my iphone; I am going to try and do that as we go along. I am not sure how much I can really narrate the pictures, though...I will have to do some more experimenting. Using this app, you post a pic and then there is an accompanying map to pinpoint location.

I know the earlier post about suffrage and the trip to Seneca Falls made the timing of this trip a bit unknown, but that's because I wrote it for the August edition of the Women's Press and had to use a little artistic license.

Our plan is to leave Minnesota next Sunday, stop to see Moll in Chicago, camp/adventure our way to DC where we'll arrive Thursday AM. I am there for a weekend meeting of the National Association of Commissions on Women -- I'm excited, it includes a bunch of great people in meetings, including a briefing at the White House and some speakers specific to my area of work that are sort of like rock stars. Minnesotans, your tax payer dollars will only pay for my time at the convention, the conference fee, hotel, and travel are all paid by yours truly. My contribution to relieving our state's deficit. I am also quite excited because our DC leg will hopefully include some time with Susanica and their darling boys.

The way home centers around our two stops -- Seneca Falls and Niagra Falls.

But today -- today is about making lists, starting laundry, assembling camping gear, etc. to prepare for our departure. I am most worried about laundry with all of the clothes we are bringing. But there is such a thing as a laundromat and hey! Most cities have one!

More to come...

Friday Fun

Happy Hour!

Sufferin' re: Suffrage

August 26 will mark the 90 year anniversary of Suffrage -- the passage of the 19th Amendment giving women in the US the right to vote.

Today I spend the morning at an event at the Capitol in the Minnesota Suffrage Garden -- called "Honoring Women Worldwide," and it's a chance to honor current women leaders right in the place where we celebrate our pioneering Minnesota women who got us the right to vote in our state. It's a very inspiring event! Above is a picture from last year's event -- it was so hot...today looks to be a bit cooler, thank God!

I've been continuing to work on 21.5.800, fits and starts, but I'm working on it. I'm working on my book (there's a lot of pottery involved, Beth!) and I'm enjoying some good shivasana. I mentioned in the last entry my writing task from teh Minnesota Women's Press. This will be published in August -- but I'll give you a sneak peak. It's on my mind because of today's garden party.

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We are getting ready. The maps are out, google is roaring, the newspaper delivery is stopped, and camping gear has been located. You guessed it: time for a road trip. The Brenengen Family is headed to the nation’s capitol for those not-so-breezy late days of summer in Washington, D.C.

Am I excited to see monuments? Yes. Museums? Yes. Metro? Yes. Wait -- did I mention free and air-conditioned museums? Yes and yes! How about the stop at Niagra Falls on the way there? You bet!

But what am I really excited about? Seneca Falls. I didn’t plan to visit Seneca Falls on the 90th Anniversary of Suffrage, but that’s how it’s turning out. And, I’m thrilled.

I work on women’s issues at the state legislature. My office is next door to the state capitol , and about once a month I take a walk across the capitol campus to the Minnesota Suffrage Garden. I call this garden the secret jewel of the capitol lawns. Not enough people know it is here, but indeed it is. It’s a large garden, bordered on the east side by a beautiful wrought iron trellis and small exhibit. The row of placards and 25 names of women suffragists from Minnesota are in the shade beneath the trees – a perfect retreat on a hot summer day. The garden has become a place of solace and inspiration to me.

When I think of Suffrage and the passage of the 19th Amendment, I think most often about how long it took to get it passed: over 70 years. That’s how long not one, not two -- but hundreds of women (and yes, generations of women) worked to give women the right to vote. There was unity, then division, then unity again. There were moments of defeat, and moments of triumph. There were times when things moved at lightning speed, and times when things seemed to nearly stop all together. Visits to the garden help me remember that change for women is not an overnight process, or even something that necessarily happens in a year or a decade. Change happens with sustained effort over time.

I’ve gone to the garden on tough days – when I feel like the legislature and the world at large are doing nothing for women, and when I am tired of trying. On those days, I put my hands on the trellis and look at the garden and silently ask for help.

I’ve gone to the garden on wonderful days – when I feel like we’re making a difference and like we are moving forward on achieving true and final parity for women in Minnesota. On those days, I walk through the garden, whisk my hand over the trellis, sit on Barbara Stuhler’s bench and say a joyful “thanks!”

I’ve gone to the garden to celebrate. Every June, Honoring Women Worldwide honors women leaders there. It’s such a powerful feeling to be in that garden, at the very moment when the past, present and future of women’s leadership in Minnesota come together. What a moment when we all stand and honor each other: I am filled with hope and unity.

It must be that these women of suffrage were like many of us. They were women who have families, women who worked (be it in or out of the home). They were the women who showed up. They were the women who found a way to take that extra minute, hour or day to help. They were women who weren’t certain that every little thing they did would win the right to vote, but they could see the big picture: they would eventually get there. They were women who had tasks to manage and prioritize -- sometimes getting everything done, sometimes feeling like they could do nothing. Sometimes they were inspired and often – they were tired.

For me, the overwhelming message of suffrage is PRESS ON. Work hard, then take the road trip. Weather the storms, and enjoy the seasonality of your passions. And -- every once in a while, stop: get up, go to the garden, and cultivate a little bit of hope.
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Have a great weekend, everyone!